Karma

I don't believe in karma. Not really. At least, not to the point where I believe that there is some mystical energy keeping track of all good and bad deeds, and this same omnipresent force also doles out the appropriate cosmic reward/punishment for each and every action a person performs. Now, I'm not saying that being a good person and doing good things is completely meaningless either. Au contraire. I very much believe that if you do good things, good things will happen to you. But, I’m saying these good things are more likely the result of human nature than some magical entity that we call karma. If you give off a positive vibe and do good things for people or society in general, then of course, your chances of having good things happen back are increased.

If you help an old lady cross the street, maybe a guy will see you do it and think to himself ‘what a good person’, and maybe he’ll be the one giving you an interview for a new job later that week. And maybe that little deed is what made him choose you over the other candidates. That's not karma - you weren’t owed that job by the cosmos - that's just human nature. More likely nothing tangible would ever come from it, aside from you making an old lady’s day a little better. If you’re a good person, you’re just more likely to be in situations that could result in good things happening for you. Not because of karma, but because other good people are going to gravitate towards you. They tend not to gravitate towards guys that lie, cheat and steal.

So, while I don’t believe in karma, I do still try to do what's 'right'. I mean, that might sound like a no-brainer, but it feels like too many people pick and choose to do the right thing only when it’s convenient for them. It’s good that they ‘try’ to do the right thing most of the time, but imagine how different the world would be if everyone did it all the time.

For example, today I bought some concert tickets. They were only selling 100 of them, and once they were gone, anyone else hoping to attend would have to win their way in. As such, they were in very high demand. I was lucky enough to add a couple to my bin before they sold out, but I easily could have bought a few more and sold them for three of four times what I paid. But that's not really the 'right' thing to do, is it? So, I left those extra tickets to be claimed by another person - hopefully someone that’s as equally grateful as me that they will be able to attend. I didn’t do it because I now think karma will owe me something. Nor was I afraid that bad karma would catch up with me either. Sure, I could have justified scalping those tickets to myself pretty easily, and not lose a wink of sleep over it either. For all I know, the next person did just buy those tickets to sell them 5 minutes later at a huge mark up. That person has no more or less of a right to do it than me, so really, if it was going to happen anyways, why shouldn’t I have been the one to do it?

Justification is such a tricky thing. Rather than actually considering what is ‘right’ and what is ‘wrong’, we spend the majority of our time trying to justify to ourselves how something we know is ‘wrong’ could technically be viewed as ‘right’. Or at the very least, ‘not wrong’. I mean, no one wants to think of themselves as ‘wrong’. I doubt that Charles Manson woke up every day and looked in the mirror and thought ‘you’re wrong, you’re evil, you shouldn’t be doing this… but let’s do it anyways, just because!’ Of course not. As easy as it is for us to see how wrong he was, some part of him must have been convinced that he was right. It’s just human nature. Heck, maybe justification is just a natural reaction your mind has to being wrong. You know, just like you can’t hold your breath until you die, maybe you can’t do wrong without your brain automatically justifying it.

For example, I have a penchant for downloading videos from torrent sites. I know it’s wrong, but I somehow justify it to myself as ‘not wrong’. Basically, for TV shows, I tell myself ‘Hey, I pay for cable, I could be watching these shows as they air, so really, I technically pay for this.’ With movies, I tell myself ‘Hey, if I like a movie, I buy it, I have a ton of DVD’s and Blu Rays on my shelves, so if I download a movie, it’s because I was never going to pay to see it anyways (so it’s not like they were going to get any money from me if I didn’t download it), and if I do like it, I’ll buy it.’

What I don’t want to admit to myself is simple: I’m wrong. I just am. Stealing is stealing, and this is stealing. Every time I click download, I’m spitting all over the tablet that the 8^th Commandment is carved upon. (And the only reason I even know about those tablets is because I downloaded that Charlton Heston movie for free off the internet…) Just because Warner Brother’s is a big faceless corporation, just because one movie viewed for free from one insignificant guy in Canada is barely a drop in the ocean for them either way, just because actors get paid more than they should, and theatres charge too much for their tickets, doesn’t mean I’m magically justified in stealing it. I may think that I’m just balancing out what I perceive to be a discrepancy, but the simple truth is, I want to see the movie, I don't want to pay for it. The ‘right’ answer is to either pay full price or not see the movie at all. But I don’t like that answer. So I make my own answer. And that, my friends, is how society works. People don’t like to accept the cold hard truth, so they go the extra mile to try to justify a new truth. Even if it’s not the ‘right’ truth.

There’s an expression in basketball: “It’s not a foul if the ref doesn’t call it.” Meaning, you can get slapped around and hit all over as you go up for a shot, but it won’t matter one bit unless the ref blows his whistle. Which, really, is just a part of the game. A ref isn’t going to see everything, every time. The part that I find interesting is that because of this, people tend to blame the ref in such instances, more than they blame the person that actually fouled them. That the other player is almost let off the hook - maybe even expected to try get away with however much the refs will allow him to. And while not all of society plays basketball, almost everyone operates under a similar philosophy: if I can get away with it, I should do it. And this might be the biggest reason that society is fundamentally flawed. 

The referee is not the problem. To me, looking to the ref is the same as us looking to the government. Sure there is stuff we need the government to do (just like basketball will always need refs), but when we feel wronged, too often we look to them to solve the problem, rather than looking at the actual source of the problem itself. Adam Carolla makes a great analogy about this type of thing. I’m paraphrasing here, but basically he says that our society is like a capsized boat. All we ever worry about is how to get the boat upright again, but we never concern ourselves with what tipped the boat over in the first place. Sure, we might get it upright again, but that’s not going to stop it from capsizing again later on.

Basically, it’s like this: when I was a kid, we’d go out trick or treating for Halloween. While we were gone there would be no one left at home to hand out candy. So, we left a bowl out front with a ‘Please Take One’ sign next to it. You can probably guess what happened next: Some kid showed up, looked around, saw no one was watching, and dumped the whole bin into his pillowcase. No one else got any candy that night. That’s our society in a nutshell. Sure, a lot of people think ‘That’s terrible…’ but sadly, plenty of people also think: ‘Good for the kid, gotta look out for number one…’ And the problem is, this didn’t just have an affect on one night. Because of it, we didn’t bother putting out candy the next year. So instead of everyone getting plenty of candy for years to come, one kid got a small amount of candy one time. 

Was it my parent’s fault for putting out the candy in the first place? Of course it seems stupid to blame them, all they were trying to do was have candy available for all the kids. They trusted that people would do the right thing. And yet, people are just as likely to say that they 'should have known better' as they are to actually blame the kid for being greedy. It’s almost like, kids are supposed to be greedy. But my parent’s simply should have  known better than to put the candy out in the first place.

But can’t we all agree that society would be better if we could leave out the candy? That even in terms of ‘what’s best for me,' that the kid might have gotten more candy in the long run by being able to come back every year and take his fair share, rather than only getting to take more than his share once?

What if we’re not talking about Halloween candy, either? What if we’re talking about welfare or worker’s compensation? Sure, it might feel like free money to some people, but at the end of the day, that money has to come from somewhere. We’ve all heard the stories of people abusing the system. At some point something is going to have to be done about it. And maybe that ‘something’ will stop the people from abusing it, but also prevent many honest people that actually need these services from getting them too. Wouldn’t it just be easier if no one took welfare unless they really needed it?

And that’s the problem. How do you do that? How do you stop people from being greedy/lazy? Can it even be done? Are we too far gone as a society to ever hope to fix that? Will we always think that one person can’t make a difference? When everyone else is benefiting, and you feel like you’re the one person trying to do what’s right, and it’s not making a difference, it’s pretty tempting to just join back up with everyone else, and at least help yourself out in the process.


So, which is it? Am I a fool for trying to do the right thing, even if it’s sometimes at my own expense? Or am I right to try and lead by example, even if it’s never likely to bring about any change? For example: I was at a Tegan and Sara concert recently. I had really, really (really) good seats in the front row (dead centre on Tegan) and next to me was a young teenaged girl and her mother, who had gotten her daughter the tickets for Christmas, and they had driven up from North Dakota to see the show together. This girl had never been to a T&S show before, and she was super excited. Now, I'm not saying I'm not excited at T&S shows - far from it - but there’s no way my excitement could match that of a teenaged girl, there for the first time. You often hear that having a child is great because you get to experience the world through their eyes, as if for the first time again. Well, this T&S show was like Disneyland, and this little high school lesbian was like having a 4-year-old son. Her excitement. Her false hope (that Tegan would somehow notice her over everyone else in the crowd, and be smitten). Not knowing what to expect, or when to expect it. What songs they might play. What banter they might engage in. Everything. It reminded me of a time long since passed, in which I had gone through the same gamut of emotions at my first show. 



And the show was great. The music was perfect. The banter, epic. And the seats couldn't have been better. And, seasoned veteran that I am, I already knew what the perfect souvenir would be. So, when they took their final bows, and exited stage left, I sprung out of my seat and snagged the set list (the small piece of paper that each artist keeps taped to the floor so they know which song comes next). Now, this wasn't just any set list. This was Tegan's set list. It was a pretty great score. And I was beyond thrilled to now hold it lovingly in my hands. But then I looked over at my new concert buddy, and saw a look on her face that said 'ah, the set list… I never would have thought of that… I'm trying to be happy for you, but I just can’t stop my jealousy from showing…'

 So, after a slight pause, I handed it to her. 

In the moment it felt like the right thing to do. But now, I'm trying to decide whether or not I regret it.

Sure, she absolutely lit up at the gesture. I had probably just put the cherry on the sundae of this already epic trip for her. And it had felt really good as I did it. But at the same time, I easily could have kept it for myself. I hadn't wrestled it out of her fingers. Or pushed her to the ground to make sure I got to it instead of her. It was mine to do with as I pleased. But I've been to many T&S shows. I have a set list already at home (granted, not Tegan's personal one… but still). Maybe she'll never have the chance to go again. Maybe even if she does, she'll never be in range to grab the set list. Maybe I did the right thing. I'm not sure. I really would have liked it for myself. But in that moment, it meant more to her - at her first concert - than it did to me at my… err… not-first concert.



Maybe she'll move onto Lady Gaga in a week and throw the set list away. Maybe she'll cherish it forever. Maybe what felt like the right thing to do to me, now has her laughing with her friends back in Fargo about the sucker that foolishly handed it over, as they post it on eBay. I'll never know. But it sure would be nice if there was such a thing as karma. I mean, not to dislocate my shoulder patting myself on the back or anything, but I think karma would have to reward me pretty big for that one, right?