Man Crush Revisited: 10 to 6

#10 Kevin Smith

Previously Ranked: #3

 
When I made the Man Crush Hall of Fame, there was one thing I struggled with: eligibility. You see, in sports, the various Hall of Fames (Halls of Fame?) usually have a grace period that a person must pass prior to being eligible. Basically, active players are never inducted (in basketball, you're not eligible until five years after you've retired.) I like this idea a lot, because not just anyone should make a Hall of Fame. It's not for people that were good. It's for the few people that were great. For example, a guy like Chauncey Billups. He was a very good player. He won an NBA Finals MVP, a championship, and had a very good career. He will also probably retire after this season. Now, upon retirement, every good player has a few days/weeks/months of praise. People/fans/media/teammates are excited and eager to celebrate the player's career. And they should be. But, in that wave of excitement, people caught up in the hype might consider such things as a Hall of Fame induction. Chancey was good. But I don't think he was a Hall of Famer. Give a committee five years to cool down from the excitement of 'career celebration' mode and they'd probably come to that same conclusion.

I'm not saying I'm not immune to getting caught up in the excitement either. Had there been a Man Crush Hall of Fame in 2006, Gerard Butler might have been inducted into it the very moment I saw 300. I was just that excited about him. However, looking back now, (there was no Hall of Fame, so even though it wasn't really a 'grace period', it still ended up being one), I am happy that I wasn't so rash. I like the man. But he's not a Hall of Famer.

Basically, it's like this: if the Academy Awards were the Hollywood Hall of Fame (and in some ways, they kind of are), do you really think Crash would have been named Best Picture in 2005 if the committee had to wait five years prior to crowning a winner? No way. Time (and public opinion) has not been kind to that movie. In fact, it might not have even been nominated by a committee in 2010. But, because cooler heads were never given a chance to prevail, they now have to list that turd as the best movie of the year for 2004 for the rest of time. Same with Shakespeare in Love over Saving Private Ryan, and Dances with Wolves over Goodfellas.

My point being, I really like the idea of a five year grace period prior to eligibility in any Hall of Fame.

"But Travis" you say, "Jim Carrey still makes movies, Schwarzenegger just released that Last Stand movie, and Gord Downie could probably make music for another 30 years at this point. And yet all of them made your Hall of Fame…"

Well, I… err… um…

Ok, fine. Maybe I did do the opposite for this Hall of Fame than what I just described as 'the only way every Hall of Fame should ever be done.' You don't have to be such a jerk about it…

But ya, that's what made some of these decisions difficult. Because a Man Crush is different than an athletic career. It's hard to fully justify a five year grace period because Bill Murray might not technically be retired for another 20 years. Jackie Chan might last another 10. None are likely to ever regain the same amount of Man Love that I once felt for them, but it still feels silly to wait 20 years to properly honour them. And this choice - Kevin Smith - was one of the tougher ones. I haven't been nearly as into to him as I once was. But, should I assume my once great love is only going to keep fading, and induct him in the Hall of Fame now? Or should I leave the door open for a come back? I don't know. For now, he remains on the list, but just know, this was one of the tougher Hall of Fame vs. Active List decisions that I had to make.
 

---

#9 LeBron James

New Entry

 
I have a bit of a love/hate relationship with LeBron James. I hated The Decision. I hated the creation of a super team in Miami. I hated that they threw a freaking parade before they had even played a single game together. I hated that he disappeared without explanation in back-to-back years of the playoffs, in the most important games possible. I hate that he's a little too aware of how good he is. And I hated The Decision. Did I mention that already? Good. It deserves to be on here twice.

But...

I just love the way he plays basketball. I can't help it. As much as I want to hate him, at the end of the day, I just can't. I'll never root for Miami. But I can't help but root for James on an individual level. I want to see him perform at his best every single time that I watch him. I never want him to have a bad game, even if I still almost always hope that the other team wins.

The thing about LeBron, that I just simply can't remember ever with another player, is that I'm just in constant awe of him at all times. Other players have moments of awe here and there, but never complete and constant awe like James. He's just a specimen beyond belief. He's able to do things that just shouldn't be possible. There are no holes in his game. He scores, he rebounds, he is a brilliant passer, and in my opinion the best (and certainly the most versatile) defender in the league. No one has ever been that well rounded. Scottie Pippen? Maybe. Grant Hill, pre-foot injury? Perhaps. But LeBron is still at another level than even those very great players.

Now, don't get me wrong. I still think Michael Jordan is the greatest player of all time. And I don't think, even at his current pace, that LeBron will surpass him. Jordan was just too crazed of a competitor, and in order to supplant MJ at the top of the list, LeBron would have to be too. And he's just not. He's plenty competitive, don't get me wrong. But for Jordan, it was almost a mental disorder. A sickness. And while it was probably what made the difference between him simply being great and being the greatest of all time, it's not a burden I would wish upon anyone. Even LeBron.

That said, if he did have it. If he did have that unrelenting drive to be the absolute best. To win every game at all costs, having no concern for the wake of destruction left in his path. Then once you factor in his ability, and his physical gifts, he absolutely could be better than Jordan. And he's one of the few guys that you could ever say that about. Ever.

You cannot claim to be a fan of basketball and not love what LeBron James is able to do on a basketball court. If you're not in constant awe of him then there is something wrong with you. You don't have to like Miami. You don't have to defend The Decision. But I don't know how you cannot love LeBron James. My boy Bill Simmons said it best (as he often does): "If you love basketball, I really hope you're appreciating this."

---

#8 Jemaine Clement

Previously Ranked: #6

 
I still love me some Jemaine, but seriously, I need more of him in my life than I'm currently getting these days. Obviously more Flight of the Conchords would be ideal, but even if that's not in the cards, I would taken any other option provided to me. Something. Anything. Please.

---

#7 Bryan Cranston

New Entry

 
It's no secret how much I love Breaking Bad. It's not just the best show currently on television, but also one of the greatest ever. We really are in a golden age of television. In fact, TV probably surpassed movies a couple of years back, in terms of being the better medium for story telling. A notion that would have been nothing short of laughable back in the 80's or 90's. But it's true. There's just no way to squeeze the amount of narrative, character development and emotional investment into a two hour movie like you can over the course of a well-planned out season of television. And that's why, now that the proper time, attention and money is starting to be invested in great television shows, that they are now at the unsurpassed level of quality which we are currently seeing.

But that's not the only reason Cranston is here. No, he's just a great dude. Funny, self deprecating, humble. Just a ridiculous ball of talent, that never for a second let's any of it go to his head.

And don't forget, it's not just Breaking Bad, he was also in several episodes of one of the other greatest television shows of all time, too: Seinfeld.

---

#6 Bill Simmons

New Entry

Back when I made the original list, I had only been introduced to Simmons a few months prior. I was enough of a fan even then that Sneep predicted he would make that original list. But, alas, he did not.

Since then, it has been non-stop Simmons in my life, and I couldn't be happier. He influences my opinions on basketball. He convinced me to watch The Wire (his pick as the greatest television show of all time). And his weekly columns and regular podcasts are all consumed by me with great anticipation, and rarely end in disappointment.

He is the highest 'New Entry' on this list. And he couldn't be more deserving of the honour (assuming being on some random dude with a Blogger account's Man Crush list is actually an honour...)

Man Crush Revisited: 15 to 11

#15 Matt Damon

Previously Ranked: #12

 
Much of my Man Love for Matt Damon last time around stemmed from my love of the Bourne Trilogy. One might think that since he wasn't in the most recent Bourne movie - the only one released since the last list was made - that this might hurt Damon's ranking on this list (and maybe raise up Jeremy Renner in the process). Not only is that not the case, but it's even maybe increased his stock a little bit. The last Bourne movie just wasn't very good. Disappointing, is perhaps the best term to describe it. Was that due to a lack of Damon? Maybe. Maybe not. It certainly didn't help.
 

---

#14 Jason Statham

Previously Ranked: #10

 
I haven't seen anything he's been in since the last list came out. That can't be a good sign. Of course, I don't really see as many movies these days as I used to, and a few looked like they might have been worth my time. So take that statement with a slight grain of salt. I still love the man, but at this point it's mostly for the things he did 10-15 years ago. Also: Statham has been around for 15 years?! I'm getting old...

---

#13 Clive Owen

Previously Ranked: #9

 
Again, another previous Top 10 guy whom I haven't seen a single movie that he's been in since the last list was made. Only this time, it's for a completely different reason: he just hasn't been in anything. Statham has been in stuff, I just haven't seen it. Clive just kind of… disappeared. Hopefully he'll be back and better than ever, but as with Statham, right now, my love is still mostly based on fond memories from the past.

---

#12 Quentin Tarantino

New Entry

 
I love Tarantino the director. I really can't decide about Tarantino the man. Is he a genius? Is he a self-important, pompous, blow hard that thinks the sun rises and sets solely for him? Or is it all just a TV/Awards Show/Late Night persona that bubbles to the surface whenever the cameras are rolling? I'll probably never know, but the one thing I do know is that he's batting damn near 100% in terms of me loving each and every one of his movies.

I mean, even the ones that were kind of 'm-eh' (Jackie Brown, Death Proof) were still decent. And the rest are all classics (or damn close to being classics). Whether you agree with that statement or not, you still have to admit, no one makes movies like he does. There's just nothing even close. There are better movies, sure. Maybe even more entertaining movies. But there is nothing else quite like a Tarantino movie. And considering the success he has had, you would think that the studio executives would be working around the clock trying to find some hack who could do a decent enough Tarantino impression to cash in at the box office. When you're as well known and successful as he is, and yet there's still no one else like him out there, that's pretty impressive. I don't know if I love the man, but I definitely love his movies.

---

#11 Trey Parker and Matt Stone
Previously Ranked: #21

 
Considering it's now about to start it's 17th season, and has remained consistently funny throughout each an every one of those years, South Park has to be in the running as one of my favourite television shows of all time. Sure, it's not as funny as The Simpsons was in it's heyday. Nor are it's five best episodes better than the five best episodes of Firefly. In fact, it's probably not even close. But in terms of being consistent, I'm not sure I can name any other show that has been this good for this long. Sure, there are always a few stinkers in each season. In fact, the stinkers are starting to get a little more common as the seasons go on. But still, 17 seasons alone is nothing to sneeze at. And considering that I've had South Park in my life longer than I haven't, I think it's safe to say that the two guys that are the driving force behind it have certainly earned this spot on the list.

Man Crush Revisited: 20 to 16

#20 Charles Barkley

New Entry

 
Barkley is an absolute anomaly. I mean, he was barely over 6'4" and yet, not only did he play Power Forward in the NBA (most Power Forward's are 6'9" or 6'10")  but he also dominated the position as well. In fact, up until Tim Duncan (7'0" by the way…)  came along, he may very well have been the greatest Power Forward of all time. That's impressive enough, but factor in his size and it's damn near staggering.

That said, that's not why he's here. Well, not the only reason, anyways. No, he's here because of his larger than life personality. He's just a smart, funny, and knowledgeable dude. He's that rare person that, despite being a little crass, everybody loves. And of course, most famously, he speaks his mind like few others can. And that candid, unfiltered candor is definitely what most people love and respect about him. Myself included.

---

#19 Craig Ferguson

Previously Ranked: Honourable Mention

 
I only consistently watch one Late Night talk show: Craig Ferguson. I'll catch clips from Conan, Fallon and Kimmel when they start making the rounds online, and I'll sometimes check out a guest or musical act that I really like if they do Leno or Letterman. But in terms of actually sitting down and watching a show start to finish, only GP the Fergs get that honour.

I can't really even put my finger on it (what I love about the show so much) either. I guess it's because the it just sort of feels like it's entirely off the cuff. Sure, there's at least 25% scripted/rehearsed material per night, but the rest genuinely feels like its just being made up on the spot. Maybe it's not, I honestly don't know, but it feels like it is. And I like to think I have a pretty good nose for sniffing out such things.

Of course, 'off the cuff' doesn't mean a damn thing if it's not funny. And that's what makes it so great: it's as good as, if not better than the other - fully scripted - late night shows, but with the feeling that it's all just being made up as the night goes on. The whole thing sort of feels like, 'Well, not many people watch us (the CBS executives included…), so let's just do what we want.' And there's something endlessly endearing about that to me. Plus, the guest interviews feel more genuine and are way more interesting than most other shows, as they too feel completely unrehearsed, and more like two people just having a conversation.

Basically, I just can't see a production meeting where some CBS guy in a suit is pulling all the strings, saying things like "Hey, Craig, just hit on the guests, and tell dirty jokes with a foul-mouthed rabbit hand puppet." The whole show just feels like they give Ferguson carte blanche to do whatever he wants, and everything on screen is really just an extension of Craig being Craig. None of it works without him. Which is a fairly bold move, when you think about it, because he has a very specific brand of humour that not everyone will be into. I mean, he got one of those bad two-man-horse halloween costumes back when that Secretariat movie came out in 2010 for a one-off gag, and somehow it's become a main character on the show. His sidekick is a robot skeleton which, on paper, is kind of stupid, but in reality, is one of the show's strongest elements. And it all comes down to the great dynamic between Craig and the guy that operates the robot (Josh Robert Thompson - who is great at keeping up with Craig during the improv, while also providing a ton of really good voices and impressions).

That's why I'm convinced the show isn't scripted or planned out. Because none of the best moments that happen make sense/work on paper, or would make it past a pitch meeting. Craig just goes out there and trusts that he can find the funny moments without the need for a prepared joke or elaborate setup. And he's smart/witty/quick enough that he can feel when a moment is working and knows to stay with it until it becomes something great (or, just as importantly, when it's not working and it's time to bail) and the other people around him on the show do a great job of keeping up with him, and are able to react and build on a bit if he suddenly throws it to them without warning. And it's that sort of stream of consciousness, non-sequitur humour that the show lives and dies by. Which is also what I love about it. Rather than trying to be all things to all people, it would rather just really appeal to the small group that share that same very specific brand of humour. A group which, based on this Man Crush, obviously includes myself.

---

#18 Jeremy Clarkson

Previously Ranked: #25

 
Not much to say here. I still love Top Gear, and I still love Clarkson.

---

#17 Joseph Gordon-Levitt

New Entry

 
I remember watching 3rd Rock from the Sun when I was young. I don't remember much about it specifically, and all that I really do remember about it is that it was just a fairly standard, run-of-the-mill sitcom. That there was nothing particularly exceptional about it, or enough to raise it above the rest of the formulaic fare of the era (gag, laugh track, everything back to the way it was by the end of the episode, rinse and repeat).

What I really don't remember about it is ever thinking at the time that the kid that played Tommy might some day be one of my favourite actors. He wasn't bad on the show, but he didn't stand out by any stretch of the imagination. So, when Brick and The Lookout came out, and I thought to myself, "Isn't that the kid from that John Lithgow show? Well, this is probably going to suck…" you can imagine my surprise when not only did I really enjoy both movies, but the kid from 3rd Rock was actually really good in them.

(500) Days of Summer was one of the better Rom-Coms that I've seen in recent memory, Inception was solid, The Dark Knight Rises, while disappointing overall, had it's moments, and Looper was the best movie of last year. Maybe even the last three years. Not a bad resume. Enough to get you a on the Man Crush list at any rate.

---

#16 Bret McKenzie
Previously Ranked: Honourable Mention

 
While I still don't love him quite as much as Jemaine, I will fully admit that since the last list was made, a period during with which Flight of the Conchords (my main source of love for both men) has all but disappeared, Bret has been the far more successful of the duo. I mean, his work on The Muppets movie was dripping with Flight-eqsue goodness, and I think anyone would agree that they'd rather have an Oscar (like Bret does), over being like main villain in Men in Black 3 (like Jemaine was). Either way, Bret deserved to be on the list last time, and throw in his more successful post-Flight career, and I don't think I need to justify this Man Crush any further.

Man Crush Revisited: 25 to 21

#25 Robert Downey Jr. 

Previously ranked: #13

 
A fairly large drop, but still in the Top 25. And it's clips like this (sorry about the swearing) that do it for me. Just a great sense of humour about himself.

---

#24 Will Arnett

Previously ranked: #19

 
His post Arrested Development career hasn't been great, but a new season is coming at the end of May, so even though he's clinging to life on the list right now, he might have skyrocketed up into the low teens the next time I revisit this thing.

---

#23 Nick Offerman

New Entry

Obviously without the greatness of his Ron Swanson character on Parks and Recreation, I probably wouldn't even know who Offerman is. But still, it's a pretty great character, and one that might be enough to get him on this list from that greatness alone. On top of all that, the small amount I've seen of him outside of the show, not only suggests that the man and the character might not be so different from one another, but between some solid appearances on the Carolla podcast and two of the better Reddit AMA's that I've seen, he has definitely earned his place here on the list for more than just Parks and Rec.

---

#22 Joel McHale 

New Entry

Again, the assumption here is that my love of Joel McHale stems entirely from my love of Community. And while that is mostly true, McHale has been on my radar for slightly longer than that. I used to enjoy The Soup on a fairly regular basis. And again, his appearances on the Carolla and Nerdist podcasts have pretty much cemented the fact that he's a pretty awesome dude in 'real' life as well.

---

#21 Conan O'Brien 

Previously ranked: #15

Conan makes me laugh almost every time I watch something of his. So, why don't I watch his late night show then? I don't know. I used to. But for some reason, I just don't anymore. I still love the man, but if I can't summon enough interest to watch him on a nightly (or even semi-regular) basis, I can't help but have him slip a bit on this list as well. Super solid to follow on Twitter though. One of the best.

Man Crush Revisited: Missed the Cut

The revised Man Crush list features ten new entries from last time. Which is no small amount, really. Six of the previous entries on the list have already graduated to the Hall of Fame  as of last week, but that still leaves four spots that must be vacated in order to make room for the new people. Unfortunately for these folks, they just didn't quite have what it took to make the Hall of Fame, and instead, simply dropped out of the Top 25 altogether.

They are:

Tony Jaa (previously ranked #24): Don't get me wrong, Jaa is an impressive dude. But to be a Man Crush you have to check more than just one box. I fully admit that I was maybe a bit hasty when I put him on the original list.

Gerard Butler (previously ranked #16): I'll admit that I was blinded by my love of 300 when I originally put him on the list. He's done nothing to maintain his spot since then. Moving on.

Adam Baldwin (previously ranked #14): I love Firefly, I do. And the first few seasons of Chuck were pretty good as well. But sadly, they aren't enough to keep Baldwin in the Top 25.

Ryan Reynolds (previously ranked #17): I said it best in my original write up for him: "If it's good enough for Scarlett Johansson, then it's good enough for me." Well, my girl Sco has since tossed him to the curb, and so am I. Actually, that's not the real reason. in fact, this was probably the hardest cut for me to make, since I still think he's a pretty funny/modest/awesome dude in real life. He's definitely still a Man Crush, just not quite Top 25. Although a quality movie/television release could very easily win me back over.

Man Crush Revisited: The Hall of Fame

Well, it's finally happened. I've been doing this blog long enough that I can actually start doing posts about the posts that I have already posted. Enough time has lapsed. So, what I'll be doing over the next several weeks is revisiting a few lists (Man Crush, Cars, etc…) and updating them to reflect any changes/regrets/updates that may have come to pass in the time since they were posted.

First up will be the Man Crushes.

That list was made in early 2010, and now that over 3 years has passed, it could certainly use an update. My biggest issue with the original list was that I didn't know how to rank historical Man Crushes. Was the list a ranking of where these guys were at their very peak, when I was most in man-love with them? Or was it the way I felt at that very moment? I mean, in 1995, my love of Hakeem Olajuwon was a 10 out of 10. But, by 2010, he hadn't played a game in ten years. Sure, I still remembered him fondly, but since so much time had passed since his absolute peak, he had probably faded to a 4 or 5. When the list was being made, Robert Downey Jr. was fresh off Iron Man, and was riding an all-time high of around 7. So, do I put Hakeem ahead of Downey based on his peak of 10 vs Downey's 7, or should I have gone with the ranking as of the day the list was made (5 vs 7)?

In the end, I went with the latter. It made more sense, and felt like a better reflection of me at the time. But, every time I got to the Hakeem's, and Bill Murray's, and Jackie Chan's of the list - guys that I loved greatly, but hadn't been doing enough work to pop up on my radar in recent years - it felt weird to rank them so low on the list, knowing that at their peak, they would have been ranked much higher.

So, I've come up with a solution. Before I revise the list officially, I'm going to create a Man Crush Hall of Fame. This way, I can retire some of these names that really deserve to be on the list, but just aren't as active in my life as they once were. Then the Top 25 can return to being about fully in the moment, and these all-time great guys won't be relegated to the lower rankings that they really don't deserve.

Without further adieu: The Inaugural Class of the Man Crush Hall of Fame:

George Carlin
Jim Carrey
Jackie Chan
Gord Downie
Chris Farley
Michael Jordan
Shawn Kemp
Jason Lee
Bill Murray
Hakeem Olajuwon
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Jerry Seinfeld
John Stockton
Christopher Walken


Honourable Mentions:
(Guys that I came to love after learning about them long after their time had passed. Hard to say I had a Man Crush on them - hard to put them in the Hall of Fame as a result -  but easily would have been Man Crushes, had I been around/alive/aware of them during their peak, and therefore deserve mention)

Andre the Giant
Bill Hicks
Bruce Lee
Paul Newman
Ayrton Senna
Jerry West

Regina (a surprisingly 'vagina joke' free post)

Last week’s post was a bit of an accident. It started out with the intention of being nothing more than a brief introduction to the post that I was actually trying to write, wherein the karma stuff would serve to get it started, and after a few quick paragraphs about it, I would tell the Tegan & Sara setlist story before doing a flimsy transition into the real story that I was planning to tell.  As you can see, it soon spiraled out of control, and before I knew it, I hadn’t even gotten to the main story and I was already 2600 words in.

So, I did what any self respecting writer with even a grain of integrity would: I trimmed off all the fat, kept only the most important thoughts and points, told the story that I intended to, and posted the new, concise, and much more focused piece with a sense of great personal satisfaction.

Yeah, right…

Really, I thought to myself ‘sweet, I can actually squeeze two posts out of this turd…’ and clicked ‘submit’ without a second of hesitation. I could worry about the rest of the story later (ie: right now) and better spend the time watching a few episodes of Deadliest Ice Road Cupcake Wars before bed.

So, picking up where I left off last week: I had just told the story of how I selflessly gave up a genuine Tegan set list to the young girl sitting beside me at a Tegan & Sara show. Did I mention how noble it was of me? No? Because really, it was borderline heroic. Anyhoo… what I didn’t tell you was how I came to be at this particular Tegan & Sara show. I know, I know, you’re dying to know. And that’s why I’m going to tell you.

Wait. You’re actually still reading? Bless your heart. I’ll try not to make it too boring. Thanks for indulging me.

First and foremost, you have probably already figured out that this was not the Edmonton show. I mean, it’s pretty obvious with the clues I’ve already given, and you’re not a complete idiot, right? But what you may not know is that when they announced the tour, I had actually told myself that I would only do the Edmonton show this time. In the past I had made the drive to Calgary as well, and while I felt it was absolutely worth it each and every time, I still decided that I would just take in the one show this time around. Then they announced the venue: The Shaw Conference Centre. It's not a bad building, but man, it is definitely one of my least favourite concert facilities in Edmonton. So, already less than thrilled, when the VIP tickets (those which got you the aforementioned meet & greet) sold out instantly, even though I clicked away as quickly as I felt was humanly possible, I found myself more disappointed than excited about the show, once the dust settled.

Then I saw that Saskatchewan was still going on sale in an hour. And I saw that the venue was much more intimate, and would have much better acoustics. And more importantly, when I clicked on the 'buy' button, simply to see what was available before clicking cancel, I saw that not only could I have VIP, but I would also be front row, and just about centre on where Tegan normally stands. And, being a man of weak will, and little self-restraint, instead of 'cancel' I clicked 'accept'.

That's how I found myself on the road to Regina. Driving 16 hours in a 33-hour span, simply to get another meet & greet, and the best concert seats ever. And believe me, it was worth every mile, and every dollar spent on gas and stale gas station hot dogs. I'm not sure if it was the seats, or the venue, or the banter, or what, but the Regina show was much better than the Edmonton show. At least, it felt that way to me. But, I'm getting ahead of myself, because sometimes the journey is more important than the destination. In this case, the destination was pretty awesome, but still, I needed to get there none-the-less, and not wanting to be late, I felt that if I left at 7am, I would arrive at my hotel with 3 hours to spare. Sure, it was another hour to drive to the venue (I took the cheapest hotel I could find, which happened to be in Moose Jaw), but I still figured this would give me plenty of time and room for error.

Well, if you know anything about me and my relationship with mornings, it should come as no surprise that I didn't really get going until about 7:45, but it didn't matter, I still had over an hour of leeway, right? Of course, it wasn't until I noticed five hours into my drive that for some reason my car clock was now different than my phone's clock, that perhaps I was mistaken. You smarty-pants readers at home probably know the simple reason for this already: I had passed into the central time zone. But stupid-pants Travis hadn't considered this at all, And just like that, my last hour of leeway had vanished into thin air. Suddenly I was in the one position that I never wanted to be in.

I was in a rush.

Now, up to this point the roads had been fine. The cruise control had been set to a steady 122 km/h, and really, I could have easily gone faster on such a clean/clear surface, had it not been for my fear of getting nabbed by the Five-O. But now, I suddenly found myself in a hurry. I hadn't showered that morning (figuring I would have plenty of time to kill before the show), and I now had to decide between shaving 20 minutes off the drive and another 20 off by not showering and heading straight for Regina, or risking it all, and sticking to the plan of stopping in Moose Jaw first. My hotel didn't have a late check-in, so it was either head straight to Regina, be super greasy and smelly for my meet & greet, and then have no room to check into once the concert got out and I drove the hour back to Moose Jaw, forfeiting the money I had already paid for the room in the process, or go for it.

I decided to go for it.

With about two hours to go, suddenly the roads got bad. Not undriveable, but any thing over 100 km/h soon became a distant memory. I arrived at my hotel with exactly 11 minutes left to shower if I was to hold any hope of making the meet & greet before the 6pm deadline. I was scrubbed and shampooed in record time, slapped some gel in the hair, brushed my teeth and was on the road with 50 minutes to spare. Of course, Google Maps was predicting it would take me 54 minutes to make the journey, and it was making this prediction based on being able to average the 110 km/h speed limit that spanned the entire stretch of highway between me and my destination. It did not take into the account the Top Ten worst road conditions that I have ever driven on. It did not take into account that this was the photo of Regina that had been tweeted from the International Space station mere moments earlier.

Now, I hesitate to tell the next part of this story, because, well, I'm not proud of it. In fact, I'm damn near ashamed. But, it was a decision I made, so I might as well accept it. You know when the roads are awful (like, the type we’ve had here the past few days…) and you see a guy that's driving way too quickly for the conditions, and you almost wish that he would hit the ditch, just to teach him a lesson? Well, on this particular night, that douche was me. On a highway with a 110 km/h posted speed limit, the conditions were so bad that no one was doing over 70. Even the big jacked up trucks with testicles hanging from the back. Every inch of exposed pavement was pure ice. But, due to a strong, relentless side wind, one that could (and would) easily unsettle any car, there was not much of this exposed pavement visable at all, as it was mostly buried under a blanket drifting snow.

This is what stood between me and destiny. And I had come much too far to give up now. I had been on the road for over eight hours at this point, and I would sooner bury my car in the ditch than have come all this way for nothing. So, I went for it. I threw caution completely (and literally) to the wind, and I went for it. I needed to stay in the 100km/h range, or I stood no chance of making it in time. I could slow to 90 when it got extra sketchy, and could squeeze 110 when it wasn't, but I needed to average triple digits. It was stupid of me. It really was. I was passing cars and trucks like they were standing still. I stopped counting the number of cars and trucks - some rolled on their sides and roofs - buried in the ditch once I ran out of fingers to count them on.

Every part of me was telling me that this was a stupid thing to be doing. But I pressed on. My death grip on the steering wheel was causing my knuckles to turn pure white and numb, aching from the constant pressure being applied to them. The car came completely loose more than once, each time causing my heart to skip a beat before sending needles of cold blood coursing through my veins. My eyes were starting to feel strained from over-use, endlessly darting around on the horizon ahead for any sign of impending danger. But the clock wouldn’t stop relentlessly ticking away - wouldn't stop counting down the minutes until I would inevitably have come a long way for nothing. So, I pressed on.

Of course, you're reading this now, so you know that I made it. It had been one of the stupidest things I've ever done, but I made it. And, I probably shouldn't admit this, but it was absolutely worth it. I burst through the front door at 6:02, collected my VIP laminate, and had my arms around both of them before you could even say ‘hover hands’. Of course, if you read about my last encounter with them, you'd know why I was perfectly happy to be at the back of the line (I felt this got me an extra minute or two of face time last time). So, when suddenly the back of the line became the front, and I was the first one up, I was thrown for a complete loop. My heart was already practically beating out of my chest from the harrowing drive over, and combined with the excitement of the moment, I was pretty frazzled.

But I like to think I did ok. I didn't swing for the fences with some obscure song request like last time (although I did almost laugh when the first thing Tegan said to me was: "Any requests for tonight?") I got a pretty awesome set of autographs (I'm not a huge autograph guy, but the idea I pitched to them was actually pretty clever, if I do say so myself). And, once again, we parted with hugs all around.

It hadn't lasted as long as my previous meet & greet, but combined with the great concert, best-in-house seats, and the swell people that I befriended along the way, like I said, in the end, every mile, dollar and even stupid risk of my very safety had easily been worth it.

(Also, there's no way of knowing for sure, but since me and the girl next to me got tired of everyone sitting down for the entire show, and decided to try and get everyone out of their seat by leading the charge, there is a 28% chance that this tweet is referring to me... )